Hello loves, how are you today?  I’m your host, Lorraine, and today I want to talk about practising gratitude when living with a chronic illness.

This week, many of my friends and colleagues in the United States are celebrating Thanksgiving – a holiday traditionally spent acknowledging the blessings of the past year with family and friends. As someone living with a chronic illness, I’ve found that festivities often look quite different from years past. The gatherings may be smaller, my energy more limited, and the celebrations adapted to what my body can manage on any given day.

Holidays have a way of reminding us that so many people around the world are facing hardship, hunger, pain, loss, and grief. When you’re living with chronic illness, you’re already intimately familiar with at least some of these challenges. Given what we’re experiencing – the daily symptoms, the medical appointments, the limitations, the uncertainty – it can be incredibly easy to overlook what there is to be grateful for in our lives. We might think, “How can I be grateful when I’m struggling just to get through the day?”

But here’s what I’ve learnt: 

that’s precisely why this is the perfect time for us to reflect on what we’re thankful for and to find ways to practise gratitude. Not because we should ignore our pain or pretend everything is fine, but because gratitude can coexist with difficulty. It can actually help us navigate the challenges we face.

The research on this is quite compelling. Studies have shown that gratitude can improve both our physical and mental health, and help us be more resilient during times of stress and anxiety. For those of us managing chronic conditions, resilience isn’t just a nice bonus – it’s essential to our daily survival and wellbeing.

Experts tell us that we experience real neurological and emotional benefits when we express gratitude. First, gratitude causes our brains to release dopamine and serotonin – those are hormones that make us feel lighter and happier. When you’re dealing with chronic pain or fatigue, even small shifts in how we feel emotionally can make a significant difference to our quality of life.

Additionally, gratitude helps balance out a negative mindset by shifting our focus from what we don’t have in our lives to what we do have. When you’re chronically ill, it’s natural to focus on losses – the activities you can no longer do, the career you had to leave, the spontaneity that’s been replaced by careful planning. But when we embrace a more positive perspective, even whilst acknowledging those losses, it nurtures our mental health and wellbeing. Research has found that those who express regular gratitude tend to be healthier and happier, and have stronger relationships. These are outcomes that matter deeply when illness can make us feel isolated or diminished.

I want to be clear: practising gratitude doesn’t mean toxic positivity. 

It doesn’t mean telling yourself “at least it’s not worse” or dismissing your very real struggles. It’s about creating space to notice what remains good and meaningful alongside everything that’s difficult.

So how do we actually practise gratitude, especially when we’re not feeling well? There are several approaches, and different methods work for different people. Some of us look to the past, retrieving positive memories and being thankful for blessings we’ve experienced. Perhaps it’s remembering a time before symptoms worsened, or recalling the kindness of a friend who showed up when we needed them most.

Others focus on the present, making an effort not to take good fortune for granted.. This might mean noticing a day with less pain, appreciating a helpful doctor, or being grateful for a treatment that’s working. Others look to the future by maintaining a hopeful and optimistic attitude – perhaps being thankful for research advances or new therapeutic options on the horizon.

However you choose to do it, I’d encourage you to spend some time this week actively practising gratitude, and to find ways to build it into your daily routine. It doesn’t have to be elaborate or time-consuming. Even a few minutes can make a difference.

One approach that many find helpful is to periodically pause and reflect, considering one or two specific questions. Here are some prompts you might find useful:

1. What have I learned recently that has helped me grow – perhaps about my condition, about myself, or about what truly matters?
2. What opportunities do I currently have that I’m grateful for? These might be smaller than before illness, but they’re no less valuable.
3. What physical abilities do I have but take for granted? On difficult days, this might be as simple as being grateful you can still see, hear, or communicate.
4. What did I see today or over the last month that was beautiful? Beauty doesn’t disappear because we’re ill – sometimes we just need to look for it more intentionally.
5. Who am I happy to see or speak with regularly, and why? Virtual connections absolutely count.
6. Who is a person that I don’t speak to often, but if I lost them tomorrow, it would be devastating? Take this as a prompt to reach out today if you have the energy.
7. What am I better at today than I was a year ago? Living with chronic illness teaches us skills we never expected to develop – advocacy, patience, medical knowledge, or simply endurance.
8. What material object do I use every day that I’m thankful for having? Perhaps it’s a mobility aid that gives you independence, or medication that manages your symptoms.
9. What has someone done for me recently that I’m grateful for? People who show up for us during illness deserve our recognition and thanks.
10. And finally, simply: What are three things I’m grateful for right now? They can be tiny – a comfortable pillow, a kind message, a moment without pain.

It’s my hope that you have an opportunity this week to experience and cultivate a spirit of gratitude. Not as a replacement for acknowledging your struggles, but as a companion to them. Both can be true: life can be difficult, and there can still be things worth celebrating.

My coaching is about empowering you to live life on your own terms.  Not mine.  Not someone else’s.  Yours.  

To take back the life a chronic illness stole from you.

Every step of the way is about finding clarity, allowing and creating intention, and taking action.

If you like these questions and ponderings, sign up to my weekly newsletter to get tips and tricks from inspirational strategies to motivating mindset hacks I’ve used on myself in my fight against my illness, and with my clients in theirs.  There’s a link in the podcast bio, or you can find a sign-up link on my homepage – lifeinalign.com

And remember, you are worth it, and you get to choose.

Have a lovely day, and to those celebrating, happy Thanksgiving.