Do you live with intention? How much of your day is lived blindly, following along with old habits that no longer serve you, instead of waking up and living life intentionally? Do events or other people push you into a negative state difficult to escape from? Or is it you who determines your experience of life? What happens in life cannot be controlled. Many things in life are imposed on you whether you like it or not. You determine how you deal with challenges. Take time each day to check that life is going how you want it, not just plodding along.
Be present
Trying to do many things at once doesn’t work. To live with intention means being present, which means focussing on what you are doing and what is going on, physically, mentally and emotionally right now. Not yesterday, not tomorrow, not ten minutes ago. Right now. Many struggle with this because it sounds so obvious. As I’m typing this my phone is beeping at me to tell me to take a break, an email has just popped up, and I know there’s a few unread messages that my curiosity reaaalllly wants to look at. My android phone lets me set a do not disturb function. Calls will still come through, but all other notifications are silent and don’t pop up.
Mind chatter, especially the stuff that we speak to ourselves without needing to think, reduces our awareness and ability to focus. As thoughts pop into your head, pop them in a box for later. Write them down if you need to. I do, I have a stack of sticky notes to hand and I scribble my thought on one and put it on the cupboard above my head and will come back to it another time.
Are your expectations realistic?
People are always going to disappoint us. There’s a lot to be said on this happening because we are not living within our values. We choose people, situations, not on what we want, what fits in with our values, but with what we believe others expect of us (see, more expectations).
When it goes wrong we then wonder if we misjudged them, or if we’re at fault. Perhaps you chose to ignore the signs. Some people have a blind faith in others, and I envy that. I used to approach situations with low expectations so I wouldn’t be let down. But. I have since learned that living a life expecting to feel crap on the off-chance it will turn out great, creates not only self-fulfilling prophecy, but also a rather boring life.
For me, I have trust issues. I learned at a very young age that some people , who I’m meant to be able to trust, couldn’t be trusted. Honesty is one of my values. If someone is dishonest with me, they’re gone, they have proven I can’t trust them. Sad and disappointing maybe, but a sign to spot sooner next time.
You get to choose
Don’t give away your power. By choosing to have control over your thoughts and emotions, you choose how to handle a situation. You can choose to have the power. If you react without thought, you hand over your power. Power being thought, feelings, and even actions.
Other’s may try to tell you what you should be doing. Don’t listen. Choose your own road to travel even if is not the easiest. Sometimes, it really is worth it.
Download my list of questions to find your way towards new meaning, purpose, and to live with intention.
