Goals, plans, dreams, hopes, objective. Whatever your preferred word of choice, we can all mess up. But, what to do after you mess up?
If your goal is to lose weight, being overweight is generally because of one thing – eating too much. If your goal is to run faster, being slow is usually because of one thing – not training enough. Even me, with a health condition that means I’m slower than average at my peak, even if I don’t train I’m going to be slow(er). If your business isn’t moving along as you want it to – you’re not doing enough, or too much of the wrong stuff.
An important, and often overlooked, part of your plan is what you’ll do after you mess up. A plan works if you follow it, and if you’re doing the right things. A diet that has “free foods” will work if you’re not over-eating on them. You still need to burn more than you eat, even if pasta is unlimited. A training plan that has running 6 days a week will work, but only if you have the time for it and fit enough to begin with.
Do something different
Realistically, the majority of us will not follow a plan perfectly. It’s in the aftermath of messing up that some real solutions can be found.
Think about the last time you went off-plan – a tub of ice cream, procrastination etc – you likely felt great in the doing, and then rubbish with shame and/or guilt and regret as soon as the hit of the short-term gratification wore off causing you to say something along the lines of “I’ve f*cked up, there’s no point bothering”.
I want you to do something different. Each time you mess up, tell yourself “I have a chance to find a real solution here, am I willing to take it?” Both a yes or a no will help you moved forward, if you really want to.
Game plan
If you say no to being willing – why? The answer is super-important as it’s a key to what’s stopping you from achieving your goal.
If you say yes – congratulations on being willing to sit with the crappy stuff for a mo to come up with a game plan.
Process the mess-up immediately. Don’t wait or just decide to move on and pretend it didn’t happen. The idea is find out what caused it, and be prepared for next time. Not just ignoring it and waiting for the next time you mess up.
Figure out the patterns. What were you thinking and feeling beforehand? What was the situation? Is it one of your “typical” triggers?
Gift of time. Decide now how you’ll show up for yourself next time. Be ready. The power is in distraction.
Distraction tricks
Tricks for non-procrastinating mess-ups (over-eating, arguing, etc) are: Put on your favourite song and dance it out. Journal. Read a book. Call a loved one. Get an accountability buddy, but not one that’s so busy they’re not able to answer your call or message for hours unless downloading to someone and not needing a response works for you, sometimes we just need to get it off our chest. Anything you need to do to distract yourself.
If it’s procrastinating: Accountability buddy (same rules apply). Listen to music that motivates you. Say you’ll do ten minutes and then stop (rarely do we stop). Do the easiest thing/thing that requires the least time for a quick win. Anything you need to do to motivate yourself.
And that’s it. Rinse, and repeat. You’ll practice strategies that will become easier over time and help you get towards your goal.
If you have other ideas that have worked for you, please let me know.
